Friday, April 07, 2006

Disappointed? Grateful?

5th April 2006

Went for Qing Ming this morning. Woke up at 6.15am, felt like a zombie, so tired. Dad drove to aunt's house in Cheras and get ready to go to the cemetary. Now the mgmt ppl collect fees to maintain the place and everything was easier. Finished everything by 10.35am... Went back to Cheras and went for lunch with my cousins and aunt. Wanted to go Uncle Thomas's place but not opened, then want to eat Lum Mee but not opened, then decided to go eat Fish Head Noodles at Restoran Kaki Bola (near Leisure Mall)...

Read the Star newspaper in aunt's house. StarTwo cover page was Daniel, and there's a one and a half page article about him. Was so happy seeing him being featured, but after reading the article, i can't help but feeling disappointed.

“Sometimes when I look at old pictures of myself, I think to myself, ‘Gee, I used to be so innocent and likeable back then.’

“If I could change one thing about myself right now, I would like to go back to the way I used to be, when I was less ‘fake’, more natural, happier, and when making music was not just work,” he said ruefully.

“I think I’m getting a little too complacent and lazy as well. Everything is the same; there is no xin xian gan (freshness) in what I do. I’m just like a robot now – I’ve lost the spark and enthusiasm for what I am doing, and it’s all become work to me. Sometimes I don’t enjoy it anymore,” he added.


WTF! How can he feel this way man... He's giving up so fast? He's so fast bored of being an artist already? We are all there to cheer for him and he sighs? - quote from mich.

Already feel disappointed enough, at the restaurant, waited ONE HOUR for the food to come... I was so hungry until i was shivering... Why do you have to hurt me so bad? Today ain't a good day...

Went home, straight away went online... IH was at the sb... explaining abt it... Chilicandy opened a thread of words of encouragement... Read a few... came to Aunty Paris's post, i started crying... Read a few more.. I was too tired... I went and sleep... Doze off awhile, then can't sleep anymore... Can feel my heart beat so loud... Scary...

Woke up in the evening... went to sb again... everybody's mood was sstill down... Chatted with few pinkies at the sb... Aunty Sarah clear things up... She told me not to interpret it wrongly... It's not that Daniel is giving up, he's just tired of having a busy life like this. I cried again. Cannot tahan la... Went to the encouragement thread to leave a msg. Took me more than half an hour to compose the msg.. IH was at sb again... I guess he's there to cheer us up... Then Soursand came to my house to pick me up to MV Kim Gary...

Had dinner with Szen, Jam, Aunty Audrey and Soursand. Talked about PW mostly... Pity Szen, Jam was ejeking her the whole time. Saying she should join the aunties gang. Haha! Tried Aunty Melody's blueberry cheese tart, yummy!

Online again... surf until around 2am... Don't feel like sleeping... Chat with Soursand and Ostro regarding the article... Well, i guess Dan is really busy till he really needs a break... perhaps the article is hinting to Sony BMG and 8 Unit? Heaven knows... Perhaps he misses his family too much... Perhaps he feels like he has no life... no freedom... He prefers being the old Daniel, no worries, no work...

I better sleep... Got online chat with Daniel at Bluehyppo Cakap Je tomorrow...

1 comment:

Mich Oon said...

At least daniel called u "Sevvy"...*blushed*