Disappointing But Warm :)

170808 - Supposed to be a meaningful day. The number 17, my lucky number. The day Chong Wei vs Lin Dan in Olympics badminton. The last day of the week. The day of his last promo (Sarawak we cant go mah, so consider this as last promo lo :p). The day we supposed to have fun.


4 of us went BP. Took our own sweet time to leave kl, say wanna leave at 3pm mana tau slumber go here go there :p Was too tired, slept in the car after leading CSH to the highway. Take our time sip coffee at R&R. Geng dao. Thus, we reach BP late. Everyone panicked when seeing the clock strike 8pm and we don't even know where we are.

Reach BP mall at 8.10pm, pass by the entrance and he's already singing! Ma der, normally also never see them so punctual, when we're late they so punctual pulak. Faster park the car, but desperately need to pee so went toilet. Reach the stage he was already singing half of the 2nd song - Siapa. Talk talk, games, sing last song Say Goodbye then autograph, the end. We were like, huh? It's only 8.30pm! Waited for him near their car, aiya muka tebal sikit ask for photo la, so took a group photo and they left. Wah, I think we broke record. Shortest promo ever, and shortest time seeing him in one day. Why? Drove 7 hours to see him for 15 mins. Wow. Fantastic. Fine, our fault, we're late. But all rushing off to watch badminton finals. Aih, we also din get to watch, although we know where they're going, but we're civilized people. So we went WKCCT to makan and chit chat.


CSY had to stay in BP for work so we waited for her colleague to come and fetch her b4 we leave for KL. Hmm, overall it's actually a nice bonding trip. We talked about a lot of stuff. Laughed and joked about everything. Hehe. Someone camwhored like mad. Someone scolded me for the first time. Lol!

Sorry ah moi, I really like this pic... Be grateful you're a model on my blog :p

On the way back, an unknown number called so I answered:
"Hello cik, cik punya kereta sudah ambil ya? Itu visitor parking kertas kat cik ya?"
(I parked at the condo CSH/CSY stays, visitors have to display the visitor paper thingy)
"Oh, saya sekarang sedang balik dari BP, nak sampai dah."
"Lain kali cik, itu kertas kena pulang security tau"
(WTF, I haven't even leave the condo)
"Saya belum balik, kereta saya masih kat sana"
"Sekarang dah pukul berapa cik? Cik parking dari pukul 2 petang tau. Cik tak ambil overnight visitor parking ke?"
"Overnight visitor? Saya tak tau woh."
"Sekarang kereta cik sudah kena clamp. Kena bayar RM80 untuk buka clamp."
"Tapi saya tak tau tentang apa overnight visitor"
"Itu bukan kesalahan saya. Sekarang cik kena bayar baru kami buka clamp"
(KNNCCB! Damn 7 rude lor the way he talk! Phart phace)

How the hell I know got separate visitor and overnight visitor woh. Usually only one type of visitor pass ge mah. Deng! Samore have to speak until so rude. Too bad I didn't take down his name ah, if not, port kau him ah!

Went back, rupanya he is the 'head' of security. He dunno sesat where and have to wait for him to go back the guard house. Samore in front of me loudly say to the staff 'Sekarang sudah pukul berapa? Dia sudah park lebih 12 jam tau! Saya tak peduli, dia kena bayar lah!" Grrr! Wanna talk cannot talk to me ar? Scold the staff for what? DLGF!

Phiuuu, RM80 fly away liao. Speaking of that hor, samore dowan to open receipt for me oh! Say takde resit. Slap kau him ah. If not receipt i sure won't pay lo. Nanti they take my money go eat steamboat how? Deng. Samore the face so LCLY. Nvm, money can untung balik.



PS: CSH and CSY, I never blame you two ok. It's no one's fault :)

- Someday everything will all make perfect sense, so for now, laugh at the confusion, smile through the tears and keep reminding yourself that everything happens for a reason :)

Jin Yan

A day in my life, 16th Aug 08

Dear Diary,

Today I feel like a creep. Really useless.

Supposed to wake up at 6.30am to go somewhere. End up accidentally off my alarm and woke up late! Thus resulting in someone waiting over an hour for me, without phone credit to call. Darn.

Then we went and have dim sum for breakfast in PJ. Always take breakfast, it's good for health *rolling eyes* Not super duper yummy but still acceptable. I guess for me, nothing compares to Ah Yat. They say King Crab's dim sum is nice too, yet to try.

After that we headed to 1u for shopping! Harks! We started shopping at 11am and ended at 7pm. 8 hours of walking! We walked almost the whole of 1u, the rest bought a couple of stuff, but I only bought something which is worth less than RM25! Well, it's a good thing. But there's actually a lot (A LOT!) of stuff that caught my attention. A bag, a pair of shoes, a necklace, a belt, two vests, few pants, few shirts. Must say no no to myself. Must wait till I earn my own money.

Then went to The Curve for dinner at Kim & Gary's restaurant, was darn hungry before that cuz we didn't eat lunch, but end up full till wanna puke. Maybe cuz too hungry and ate too fast.

After that, we went to Heaven cafe to listen to the singers perform cuz Miss Chong say Maymay is performing there every Saturday night. The singers today were Kaho, Maymay & Be. When we entered the cafe Be was singing an Eason song. Quite good. Then after awhile only I realize it's the Ah Be who wrote 'Cong Xin Chu Fa' for John! The performer whom I liked since the Jiayu show in Genting! His voice is darn good weh! And cute too, mwahaha. And his guitar skill yat lau deyh! Of course, Maymay's beautiful voice is undeniable. Kaho's too was not bad. He played the keyboard. Three of them were very humorous, everyone enjoyed the night, and everyone really WATCH them perform one leh, not like what I saw in previous cafes last time. Those people go for eating and not enjoying the songs.

Went home, open the door only then smelled cinnamon rolls. Yeah, mum baked cinnamon rolls by herself! FYI, my mum is not really a good baker but she did it herself. Usually she will ask me to do but, I guess she can't wait anymore. Sigh, makes me feel so damn guilty. Why do I always end up disappointing them? I mean, I didn't do it on purpose but... aih. I never seemed to ever do things without telling. AIHHHH! Must change must change.

Yummy yummy! Irresistable. I took one immediately straight after it came out from the oven. Erm, mum had some problem with the timer, so it took longer than usual to bake. And the result wasn't as expected. I guess mum was not really happy with it. Haha, like mother like daughter, we feel sad when expecting a good result and turned out the opposite. Sigh, blame me for not being at home to bake it with her. Bu hu. Creep again.

P.S. Why would u say it if you're not jealous? And why would u be jealous if i'm not good? :)

Mixed Feelings

I guess when someone is jobless, aimless, motivationless, she'll start to think a lot... She'll worry for everything under the sun, everything over the moon, things that has no relation with her she'll also start wondering about.

All sorts of different different feelings are jumbled up within parts of my brain, and it's affecting my heart, my actions, my whatever.

1. I am disappointed. There's this DJ which I can say is my most favorite DJ of all. When I heard the news of him going over to another company, to be honest, I was pretty disappointed. I mean, he is like the signature of his ex company. And going to the new company is like going over to a competitor. But after reading some forums, well, I guess it's his choice, it's his career, it's just like a normal person changing jobs, only plus the popularity part. Maybe the new company can give him opportunity to gain more fame. Purposely waited for him after the post party last weekend, called up to him, but he sounds so unfamiliar. Sigh. But he did reply, he was rushing off so too bad. Saw a blog entry regarding this DJ last night, and I'm starting to doubt my impression on this DJ. I could choose not to believe the blog post, but it's from someone who knows this DJ. So what can I say? All the while I think this DJ is friendly, nice, hardworking, humble, funny. But now? Is the posting exaggerating? Or is this DJ really like that? Oh, I always feel disgusted when I hear him saying the company's slogan. It's like a minute ago he was highly promoting the ex company, and now the new one. Yucks.

2. I'm grateful. I am happy to have so many good friends. Thanks to those who took the effort to introduce jobs to me. Gan dong dao... I really, really appreciate your efforts. And I'm grateful for one of my lecturer, instead of urging me to get a job, he asked me to 'take ur time' :) Very surprised to hear this coming from lecturers.

3. I'm jealous. Why do some people manage to get a good job so quickly, and so contented with their job? Why do some people are being treated better even though all are from the same level? Why do some people get to travel so much? Why some people are so rich? Why do some people have the ability to purchase so many things, does money fall from the sky? Hmm, I guess it's just 'you see me good, i see you good' (cantonese) kinda thing.

4. I'm emo. Never make someone your priority when you're only an option to them. Someone has already replaced me. Well, I guess I'm never good and never meant to be good. But i'm proud of who i am.

5. I'm missing my idol. My *wub* idol. It feels like ages since I last saw him, which is like, erm, 24 days ago? Omg, it's been so long! Almost a month! I never been able to catch the show he host, so I totally don't see him at ALL. Deng. And I will only see him on 30th. Sigh, long more to go. ~When will I see you again~ :(:(:(

6. I'm scared. Ok peeps, if possible, never ever stay at Ria Apartment in Genting. It gives me the creeps. Well, i mean, nothing really happened, but I feel it's so 'not maintained'. The kitchen stinks, the pots and pans looks dirty, the pipe drips, the showerhead falls, and the blanket looks darn dirty! Plus, stories you hear about that place tortures your mentality, making you unable to sleep. Creepy-deepy.

7. I'm troubled. Lots of considerations to make, lots of decisions to make, lots of changes to apply, lots of determination needed, lots of discipline required. Sigh.. *namo namo* I should be grateful that i'm still alive.

Top 10 Tasks That Make Life Worthwhile

Take time to dream, it hitches your soul to the stars.

Take time to work, it is the price of success.

Take time to think, it is the source of power.

Take time to play, it's the secret of youth.

Take time to read, it is the foundation of knowledge.

Take time to worship, it is the highway of reverence and washes the dust of earth from your eyes.

Take time to laugh, it helps with life's loads.

Take time for health, it is the true treasure of life.

Take time for friends, they are the source of happiness.

Take time to love, it is the source of joy.

Emotionally Ill

It's so not me for putting off updating my blog for so long. I tried to write but nothing comes out.

Updates for the past week:
- Went to PC Fair twice, went to Melaka for a day trip, sat the Melaka Cruise for the first time and it was good, cooked a very disappointing dinner, watched The Mummy, laughed like mad this minute and cried like hell the next.

Seriously, don't ask me what happened to me. I also don't know. I guess I'm just emo for being so pathetically useless. I'm kinda stressed out for not having a job. I'm worried because I am doing NOTHING at all, not even baking/cooking at home. I'm so not able to manage myself. My mind is running wildly and I cant stop it. And I seemed to be going nowhere, nowhere in specific. I'm just running in a neverending circle.

Was going through the stuff on my table and I found this paper of quotes I wrote last time because I find it so true. Guess I should share with you guys. Erm, not motivational quotes but emo quotes. Because I'm emo.

• Have you ever love someone and they had absolutely no idea whatsoever 0r fell for your best friend in the entire world and watchi him/her fall for someone else?
• Have you ever denied your fellings for someone because your fear of rejection is too hard to handle? We tell lies when we are afraid.
• Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them. If you do, they might break your heart, but if you don't, you might break theirs.
• Have you ever notice the worst way to miss someone is when they are right beside you and yet you can never have them.. When the moment you can't feel them under your fingertips you miss them.
• Have you ever wondered which hurts the most - saying something and wishing you had not or saying nothing and wishing you had.
• I guess the most important things are the hardest to say.
• Afraid of what we don't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us, but everytime we tell a lie the thing we fear grows stronger.
• Have you ever decided not to become a couple because you were afraid of losing what you already had with that person?
• Your heart decides who it likes and who it doesn't. You can't tell your heart what to do, it does it on its own. When you least expects it, or even if you don't want it to.
• Have you ever wanted to love someone, but that other person was afraid to let you? Many of us stay walled because we are too afraid to care too much, for fear that the other person does not care as much or that life is all about risks and it requires you to jump.
• Don't be a person who have to look back to wonder what they would have or could have... no one waits forever.

Nothing else to blog about. Moody, sleepy. Nite.