complicated

things didn't turn out the way I want them to be..
i thought i'm strong enough to handle these emotions..
but i'm not..
it's the first time it's happening to me..
why did you ask me all those questions?
why did you make me hesitate?
why did you make me fall deeper?
it's impossible between us... 100% impossible...
it hurts so much to be close to you...
it's complicated...
fcuk it...

[Lyrics] Yuna Ito - Miss You

Nice song!

Source: Meg-chan

Stay here natsu no hikari ga
Futari sugoshita kisetsu wo tsugeru koro
I'm staying here mabushii kurai ni
Kimi no egao wo omoidashite ita

Yume ni tsuzuku ashita no tame
Futari de kimeta kyori na no ni
Namida afurete tomaranai kurai
Naze konna ni mo kanashii no darou?

Koishikute koishikute kimi wo omoinagara
Sukoshi zutsu minoriyuku mainichi mo
Massugu ni massugu ni watashi no mama ni
Koete yukeru tsuyosa ga hoshii
Demo I miss you mada hitori ja irarenai yo

Together sorezore no michi
Kasanariaeru koto bakari ja nakutemo
My love kimi to deaeta
Yasashii kimochi wo wsurenaide itai

Kimi ga kureta ai wa kitto
Tabidatsu tame no tsubasa dakara
Naite bakari no watashi ja dame da yo
Itsuka negai ga kanau you ni

Aitakute aitakute kimi wo omoinagara
Sabishisa ni furikaeru koto mo aru kedo
Mayowazu ni mayowazu ni watashi no mama ni
Arukidaseru kokoro shinjite
Sou I miss you ima sunao ni tsutaetakute

Ano hi kimi to miteta
Aoi umi to kagirinai sora wa
Ima mo kawaranai kioku to tomo ni
Kono mune ni hirogatte iru kara

Koishikute koishikute kimi wo omoinagara
Sukoshi zutsu minoriyuku mainichi mo
Massugu ni massugu ni watashi no mama ni
Koete yukeru tsuyosa ga hoshii

Aitakute aitakute kimi wo omoinagara
Sabishisa ni furikaeru koto mo aru kedo
Mayowazu ni mayowazu ni watashi no mama ni
Arukidaseru kokoro shinjite
Sou I miss you ima sunao ni tsutaetakute

Tooku chikaku kanjinagara
Sayounara no sono kawari ni...


TRANSLATION:


Stay here, when the summer light
Heralds the season we spent together
I'm staying here, 'cause I remembered
Your smile so bright

We agreed to this distance
For our dreams and for the future
But these tears won't stop
Why am I so sad?

I'm yearning, yearning, thinking of you
As little by little the days bring us closer to our goals
Earnestly, earnestly, just as I am
I want the strength to make it through
But I miss you, and I can't be alone just yet

Together, each on our own road
Even if they don't always overlap
My love, I don't want to ever forget
The tenderness I found when I met you

The love you gave me
Gave me wings for my journey
I can't just cry
If I want my dreams to come true someday

I miss you, I miss you, I'm thinking of you
There are times I look back in loneliness
But I'm walking, walking, just as I am
Without hesitation, believing my heart
Yes, I miss you, and now I can say it

The blue sea and endless sky
I saw with you that day
They fill my heart even now
Along with the unchanging memories

I'm yearning, yearning, thinking of you
As little by little the days bring us closer to our goals
Earnestly, earnestly, just as I am
I want the strength to make it through

I miss you, I miss you, I'm thinking of you
There are times I look back in loneliness
But I'm walking, walking, just as I am
Without hesitation, believing my heart
Yes, I miss you, and now I can say it

Near or far, I feel you
Instead of goodbye...

Jammed

Life has been pretty dull... besides working it's still working... of course, nonetheless onlining... hahaha... i'm just so lazy to do other things.

Previously I was in garde manger, handling cold dishes. A week ago there was a rotate in the sections. Now i'm in the entremetier side. Handling pastas and vegetables. The tasks are pretty simple, but it requires coordination from ur mind and ur hands. It requires control, control of the fire. Control of different things at the same time.

So what's up with me? Got a 2 days break for raya last month, being in this line, 2 days of rest means so much. Although I didn't stay put at home that 2 days :p Had a karaoke session with a bunch of friends, yum cha on a cool night. Although the day wasn't at all perfect, but it was ok. Tried to act smart trying to be a good advisor, which failed outrageously. The next day spent some quality time with friends whom I seldom meet nowadays. Had a very simple birthday this year... nothing much to report about, all I wanna say is, I'm really, really glad to have friends like you all. Thanks for the presents, thanks for the cakes and homemade banofee pie (my first time eating it ok!)

My mind is pretty jammed up right now. Jammed with the problem of human relations. Human minds are so unpredictable. You don't know what they're thinking. What's worse is when you cannot predict what they say is actually what they mean it or they're just saying it to please you. You don't know whether they treat you good is because they pity you, and behind you they talk all bad about you. You feel so bloody heart pain when they say some stupid thing about you and tell you just joking when they actually mean it. Well, I know it's their mouth and I shouldn't be bothered, but it's just suffering. You don't even know to treat them as a 'friend' or not. To share with them how's your day or not. You wonder if you put all your heart into the friendship and they take it for granted or not. Yes, it's bothering me. ANd it's bothering me a lot. I hope I have an answer. But I guess, the mystery will stay unsolved forever.

Going on a short holiday this weekend. So looking forward to it. It's gonna be a good weekend, I'm sure! I miss my floor measuring days. I miss all my true friends. You know who you are :)